This weekend was the first weekend long visitation with FS's older brother, who is also in foster care. I really wasn't sure what to expect. I figured that they would be "boys"...and they were. But I did not think that FS and FS's brother would be SO different. And in many ways, so much alike.
FS is a really great kid...or as he likes to say...he knows how to "act" like a good kid. He has manners. He knows the difference between what is right and what is wrong. He has respect...and that is really the only rule in our house. Everything else follows. He has his moments, but all in all is really good!
Let's talk now about FSB (foster son's brother). He does not know how to "act" like a good kid. He could care less. Which is fine...whatever. He has very little manners, and when he did it was because FS was telling him to. He knows nothing of rules or respect.
The kid LICKED my counter top after spilling pop all over it...and then walked away and said that was good enough!!!! FS looked at me and said he would clean it up. He was embarrassed. He, FSB, also would NOT take off his combat boots in my house. Even after he was out in the rain and mud all day. He walked around in my house...and got mud and grass and dirt EVERYWHERE. And would not pick it up. He swore in church...and everywhere else. He is just so lazy!!! And he SMELLED so bad. We encouraged him to take a shower...but he said he was fine!
This kid has been in foster care longer than FS. You would think he would have a little more respect for anything. And FS told me that FSB was trying hard to impress us. Well, he did.....but not in a good way!
There is sooo much more that I could add, but I don't want to sound like I am complaining. I am just in shock...and glad the weekend is over! Never thought I would say that!
Jemmers :)
5 comments:
I think that is a perfect example of what bad foster care can do to a kid. He's obviously acting out, a strong signal of needing more than he's getting. Sad, really.
You got very lucky to have an appreciative son and your continued love as well as discipline will only do good things for him.
Did you end up going to the movies over the weekend?
We feel very lucky to have FS. I don't know if I could handle FSB full time. He would HATE it here!
He is a huge example of what moving a kid around can do to them. They need consistancy, and love and boundaries! IF not...then they just don't care anymore and loose hope and act out.
I am hoping that the next visit is better!
Yes Trin, we saw Spiderman 3 on Friday!! It was great!!!
Just a thought, but it could have been serious jealousy rearing its ugly head. Maybe he was trying to get a reaction out of you just to prove to his brother...and himself...that things aren't as "perfect" as your FS might make them out to be.
Not to say that you shouldn't be annoyed at him, just a thought I had. I think I might have been tempted to stake his tongue to the counter top with a fork for the pop incident!!! But obviously you are a better woman than I am!
Katrina,
My hubby and I had the same thought. Some of the things he said and did made it seem that he was a bit jealous...or trying to mess with things.
It is tough!
The fork would have been a great choice!! :)
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